This post is based on the video – Who Can You Trust?
Can you trust me? Simple question. But gentlemen, if you are just saying
Yeah, Antonio, I trust everything you say
I appreciate that, but I don’t want you to be gullible. I don’t want you to be someone who’s going to be taken advantage of.
Be skeptical of the information. In this video, I’m going to give you three things that you need to be really careful of. Some of the stats I’m going to reveal, guys, are going to blow you away.
This comes out of a Harvard Business Review. They linked me to a number of different studies coming out of Berkley and various journals. In my article here over at Real Men Real Style, I’m going to link you over to the original article.
In addition, I’m going to link you over to the studies which I didn’t think the Harvard Business Review did a very good job of, and I’m going to explain each of the points in a lot more detail.
Which each of these points, I’m going to talk about what you need to be careful of and how you can also alleviate, how you can reduce the risk of you actually falling for any of these traps. You ready?
#1 Relying On History
Trust mistake number one. You rely on history. You assume that since someone has been trustworthy in the past again and again, that they are going to be trustworthy in the future. Assuming that you keep everything the same and you keep them within a set system and you’re going to work with them again, this could be an indicator.
But the history isn’t the indicator. It’s actually the two other factors that I spoke about. Now, this is coming out of research. I think it was Berkley. What they found it that 90% of people would actually do something that was dishonest if it was in their best interest and if there was no way they could be caught. Those factors had to go into it, but if there is no chance they’re going to be caught cheating, then people will cheat.
I know that sounds incredibly bad that 90% of us – that’s the vast majority – there’s only 10% of us that are going to do the right thing every time. I myself am in that 90%. I feel that if systems weren’t in place, if there’s no chance, I could definitely fall to the Dark Side.
Guys, I think that’s just human nature. I think that’s who we are. We are imperfect beings. As such, it’s just something that we lean towards what’s in our nature. Getting back to how to prevent this, how to actually prevent your employees, how to prevent your family, how to prevent people from falling into these traps is one, to create systems. Checks and balances.
There are many things you can do, especially in a company. I think banks have some of the best checks and balances systems. But you make sure that you don’t give one employee access to everything so that they can take advantage.
In addition, you want to have repeat interactions. If you’re going to work with someone, if you’re going to strike a deal, it’s better to work with someone you’re going to see again and again. Oftentimes, when we see cheating in a business deal, it’s where someone’s only working with somebody one time, and they’re willing to, in a sense, damage the relationship.
Especially people in sales. You’ve got a sales guy. You know he’s leaving in a couple months. He’s going to go ahead and maybe sell something that isn’t ready, isn’t actually as valuable as it is. For him, he’s going to get the commission. He’s out the door, and that’s when you see things like this happen.
#2 We Fall For Confident People
Trust mistake number two is that we fall for someone who is incredible confident again and again, especially if high-risk or money is involved. If someone is confident, and if someone’s giving off the feeling of this person really knows what they’re talking about, if this person is dressed in a certain manner – I’ve talked about how suits can send that signal of strength and of confidence, and people are more likely to open doors. They’re more likely to jaywalk and follow a man in a suit across the street.
Because of all of these things, we think that someone who is confident, someone who looks the part of a success, we’re going to follow them. Guess what? It gets us almost every time. You need to be aware.
Guys, I talk about the importance of dressing sharp. That’s because I assume that inside, you’ve got something to share with the world, and you want to make something great. But understand that there are those that will dress, that will come off confident not because they know what they’re doing, simply because they’re trying to make up for the fact that they are incompetent.
Now, how to get around this? How to figure this out? Ask probing questions. This requires you to know a little bit about what you’re talking about or asking so that you can dive in there and you can ask the specific questions that will poke holes. If they are able to hold it, then yes, that’s good to go. But if all of a sudden, you realize the questions you’re asking are not getting good responses, then it’s something that you want to reevaluate your trust with this person.
#3 Relying On A System
Trust mistake number three is relying on a system and not actually relying on your gut. I’m not going to say that you always need to make gut decisions, but I am saying that if you have a system – let’s just use the TSA as an example. They’ve actually done many studies on this.
Whenever there was a conflict on the machine said one thing, the process said one thing, but the TSA inspector had another feeling, he had a gut reaction, he should go with his gut reaction. Pretty much it was almost always right.
Versus sometimes, the process, the system does break down. How does this apply? How can you get around this?
If you have a conflict here to go deeper into and ask more questions – kind of going back to point number two – but if you have a gut feeling that this isn’t someone that you want to be associated with, that you want to do business with, but everyone else is saying “Yeah, you should”, or all these other indicators, go with your gut, or at least put off making the decision till you can gather more information.
All right, guys. That’s it. If you want more information about men’s style, you know to go over and check out Real Men Real Style.
In addition, I’d love to hear from you guys in the comments down below, what did I miss? What would you add? What would you like to see me expand on when it comes to topics like this?
Guys, I’ll see you in the next video. Take care.
This post is based on the video – Who Can You Trust?